Roses

It had been twenty years since I last saw her. She looked nearly the same as she did back then. She seemed more graceful and sure of herself. Her long dark hair seemed to hug her breast. Her olive complexion was still flawless in my eyes. A ruby ring on her middle finger on her right hand and a sapphire ring on the left index finger just like she wore in high school. She held a latte in one hand and had her purse hang off her shoulder enough rummaging around in it. The temptation to surprise her then while she was unaware of me was great but I resisted. I wanted to take her in a little while longer. My anxiety started to increase wondering how she would receive me. My god, it has been twenty years. She probably has forgotten all about me. In fact, I can just see it now. Her having a blank look on her face seeing me as a stranger. I don’t know if my heart could take that. What we shared back then was powerful. Almost like magic. It was something I could never forget. I would never want to forget it. No matter how much my family tried to change me. No, their perfect daughter couldn’t be a lesbian. It was impossible. Somehow I had disturbed their happiness.

A hard lump in my throat formed remembering the feeling of helplessness having a flash of a memory. A memory that started both of us on a course away from each other. How we evaporated out of each other’s lives because of the will of our families.

I took one step towards her and all of a sudden she had looked up at me. My plan to say something clever had passed me by.

“Rachel.” she said and stopped rummaging in her purse. Her eyes wide and a small smile formed. She had a habit of doing this side smile. Almost like an invisible string pulled one side of her mouth teasingly.

“Hi Emily.” My breath caught. She still did it to me. It was as if just looking at her took my breath away and my heart pounds in my chest. I felt the energy rise from my belly button all the way up to my heart in a moment. Just saying her name out loud made me feel energized.

“You haven’t changed one bit” Emily said.

“Neither have you.” I added. She laughed.

“Oh, if you come closer you’ll see some lines and some gray hairs.” she admitted.

“You look beautiful.” I said tenderly as I slowly approached.

“You still have that magnetic charm.”

“It’s been too long.” I said.

“Yes, it has. I’ve missed you.”