So, I’ve been going to church with a friend. It struck me how wording can push people away unintentionally. I’m a Christian. I also am spiritual. I have created a happy world around me where some false beliefs have been dismantled over time. One is that I was born a sinner. I was born in Love=God. I was born perfect and without defect. Religion tells me I’m a sinner and need a savior. That only Christians go to heaven. I cannot fathom a loving God sending people to Hell. I just can’t. I also can’t imagine a loving God sending a good person to Hell that happens to be a different faith than me. While I hold Christ in my heart and is the bridge from God to me I don’t want to force and manipulate my beliefs onto others. Don’t get me wrong, I love going to church and being connected but the wording. Sinner. Ugh. Plus, I can’t believe a loving God would send an Atheist to Hell. Just no. I know loving Atheists and well as loving Christians. Isn’t that is what it’s all about. The connection of Love? I know I am not the only one to question this belief while kneeling down and bowing my head. I do kneel and bow my head in sincerity to Jesus. However, I don’t kneel and bow my head out of obligation and fear. That is something I feel like I have grown out of. As a child I would bow my head and say Amen without a questioning it. Now, as an adult I think I’m encouraged to question and even dare I say, doubt. I doubt sometimes the validity of my belief system. Without testing and questioning how do we deepen our understanding? I can clearly see me loving Jesus and questioning Him. Do we really have all the answers we are so sure of? I do not say this to shake anyone’s faith. I say this for myself as a expressing what is going on with me in this current moment. I have seen in my life that it comes down to two things sometimes. Am I living in fear or in love? I chose to live in love. I chose to live in Love. Some of my beliefs may seem radical and even contradictory. I’m okay with that. I’m living, learning, loving and questioning. I hope in your journey wherever you may be that you compassionately, lovingly question. You don’t even have to come up with an answer. To live with the question and to embrace it.
Raven aka Reina